The Evolution of Dating...

So, for my class at BYU-Idaho on The Family, I have to do a project that will last the entire semester. I have chosen to write a blog that focuses on Marriage and The Family.

Well, inevitably, before you get married, you have to date. There's several reasons as to why dating has gone into a downward spiral in today's society. The one I would like to focus on for this specific post is "Dating vs. Hanging Out."

When did dating evolve from courting in the 1950's to what it has become now in the 21st century?

Tom McGinnis, in a book titled "A Girl's Guide to Dating and Going Steady." written in 1968 described courting:

During the 1950's, it was common knowledge, at least to girls, that there was a process to the whole courtship ritual -- that there were stages to a lasting relationship. First, when you are young, you associate with boys in the playground, and do not seriously form any romantic relationships with them. Then you progress to flirting and talking to them which leads into dating. The dating process usually is initiated by going out on double-dates. Double-dates were used to initiate the whole dating process because it created a more open environment conducive to easy conversation. So the initial shyness of young couples can be eased away by the presence of other company, especially if the double date was a "set-up" or a blind date for one couple. After double dating, you would naturally move onto single dating. And should the relationship move on, as they often do, it would move into the ubiquitous "going steady" stage (McGinnis 74).

Oh how far we have come from this notion. Now, it is easy to see the appeal of "hanging out" over dating.There is a lesser amount of awkwardness, usually, when hanging out with someone, as opposed to putting the menacing label of a "date" on the evening in question. Hanging out usually includes a smaller price to pay, for the guy anyway.

 In traditional dating, a man asks a woman on a date and pays for the evening. Typical hanging out usually involves a group of people, and I'm not saying this is a bad thing. Hanging out can help ease a shy person into dating. However, if people  My textbook says, "Young adults often report finding that even when they have been hanging out with someone over a period of time, they still do not know it they are a couple." 

Elder Dallin H. Oaks said in a talk about dating vs. hanging out, "Simple and more frequent dates allow both men and women to “shop around” in a way that allows extensive evaluation of the prospects. The old-fashioned date was a wonderful way to get acquainted with a member of the opposite sex. It encouraged conversation. It allowed you to see how you treat others and how you are treated in a one-on-one situation. It gave opportunities to learn how to initiate and sustain a mature relationship. None of that happens in hanging out."

In dating, we look for qualities we want to have in an eternal companion. We should date those who have similar standards to ours. For the Strength of Youth says, "Choose to date only those who have high moral standards and in whose company you can maintain your standards. Remember that a young man and a young woman on a date are responsible to protect each other’s honor and virtue." This is truth. Dating with a purpose will be so much more beneficial, in the end, than continual hang-outs with members of the opposite gender. 

Now, I can't tell anyone what to do. But I can share what I think, and that is the whole purpose of this blog: to inspire, to uplift, to inform, and to educate.